May 29, 2024
Inspiring Wellness and Legacy Through Accountability with Dr. Matthew X. Joseph
EPISODE HIGHLIGHTS:
Discover the power of wellness and accountability in education as we explore enriching self-care routines with Craig and Krista. We're joined by Dr. Matthew X. Joseph, who reveals his secret to maintaining a dedicated wellness routine through public accountability. His early morning workouts, shared on social media, keep him motivated and inspire others. Dr. Joseph’s passion for amplifying voices in educational publishing further enriches his sense of well-being and professional fulfillment.
In a heartwarming segment, we share the profound impact of family traditions on our lives, from sibling rivalries to cherished memories with grandparents. These moments illuminate the importance of inspirational content and the lasting warmth of family dynamics, underscoring how the love and wisdom of our elders shape our lives.
Finally, we delve into legacy, vulnerability, and empowerment themes sparked by George Xavier Joseph. We discuss the power of disciplined routines, self-awareness, and morning productivity, touching upon key insights from books like "Always Stop at a Lemonade Stand" and "Stronger Together." Embracing authenticity and self-care, we highlight how public accountability and sharing personal journeys can inspire and support others. Join us as we celebrate the positive influence of community and family within the SEL and EDU space.
EPISODE RESOURCES:
- Connect with Matthew: website, speaker bio, twitter
- Listen to his podcast, Stronger Together, and check out his books.
Chapters
00:01 - Wellness and Accountability in Morning Routine
11:42 - Family Memories and Grandma's Cookies
15:28 - Legacy, Vulnerability, and Empowerment
24:28 - Embracing Authenticity and Self-Care
33:45 - Inspirational Conversation With Craig and Krista
Transcript
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Welcome to SEL in EDU where we discuss all things social and emotional in education.
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I'm Krista, I'm Craig and we are your hosts on this journey.
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Welcome back SEL in EDU family.
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We are thankful that you are taking time from your busy day to listen in on us as we chat with amazing people in the field who have great expertise in SEL.
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Craig, how are you today?
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Look, I am all over the place today.
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I just actually lit a candle, a little mahogany teak wood in tints from Bath Body, because I needed that.
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I got a little Palo Santo because I'm like sometimes you just need to clear out whatever is in the ether, and so I'm just trying to get clear, I'm trying to romance myself into this podcast.
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Romance yourself.
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You need to start there.
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We need to love ourselves first.
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Like when they say on the airplane put your own oxygen mask on first.
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Absolutely, absolutely so far.
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S-a-l-a-e-d-u family.
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How do you, you know, when you, when things ain't vibing in the way you want and you ain't getting the vibe like, how do you actually go about getting your vibe right when you are working through so much of what's going on out here in this world?
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So I'm just curious, but while that's, you know, kind of percolating out there for the audience, krista, how are you doing today?
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I'm good and I'm actually going to answer your question because for me and I know this like I take a nap, I need it.
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I just shut it all down the whole system, and I come back up and I often have a new, a new perspective.
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I have renewed energy.
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I have friends who are like I need to go out for a walk.
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I'm like I just need to shut it all down and so that's that's where I'm at.
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I love the candles, but I'm like, yep, I need a nap.
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So, we'll find out from our speaker today, our guest today too.
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Bring him on in to our conversation.
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We'll do so.
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This is a good friend of mine, one who is a giant among us, who has an incredible heart I mean an immense servant leader of our wonderful Commonwealth districts here.
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He's also the CEO of X Factor EDU.
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He is actually a published author for almost a fifth time.
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I know we working on something else right now, but you got Power of Connections, cultivating Professional Learning Networks and Redefining Educator Collaboration Stronger Together which is one of my favorites Modern Mentoring and more.
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This gentleman here is also the president of Massachusetts ASCD, among other things.
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So there's so much that I'm sure we could explore and share right now in the introduction.
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But if nothing else, he is a friend of ours, a friend to the world.
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Dr Matthew X Joseph, how are you doing?
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How's your heart, sir?
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Oh, it is so full right now.
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I could just log off and my day would be made like that.
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I don't think I'm going to just next time I'm going to speak somewhere and be like Craig, do you mind just coming and introducing me?
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Because that's it.
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Like I sound really, really important and I think when you say how my heart is, it's full because I'm talking to the two of you and that is.
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That's at the heart of the work that I do.
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I love to collaborate with folks.
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I love to have others shine.
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A friend of ours, you know, jeritza.
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We're working on her newest book that's coming out really soon and it is amazing.
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It is actually a graphic novel.
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I won't get too deep into it, but it's about her continuing her Mackenzie's adventure and Mackenzie growing up and looking and reading band books.
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It's just super exciting.
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And for me, what gets my heart and excitement warm is to amplify other people's voices, like I just just get powered by that.
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So I you know I'm going to kickstart some things off this, because one of there are several things that I'm most inspired by with Matt.
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One of them is around wellness, and so over the years, I have seen Matt, you know, doing manman challenges.
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In my head that's what I call them 5Ks.
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I think you might've done a 10K, but you start at 5 am or 4 am in the morning and whether or not it is actually being in the gym or taking a morning walk with your beautiful furry friend yeah, his Muslim man you have prioritized that as a centering agent for how you start and lead your day.
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I would love if you would kind of share with us, like you know, why have you made the choices you've made in regards to starting your day off?
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What have you?
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What have you and are you learning about yourself in those prime moments, first thing in the morning as you start your day?
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Yeah.
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So I'm going to kind of thank you and yes, that is something I do every day.
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I do something starting at five o'clock, and not because I'm just an early bird, because I am the worst at keeping to a schedule if I don't make public accountability, keeping to a schedule, if I don't make public accountability.
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So and this is going to talk go into a little bit of wellness and social media too, because some people get confused with being cocky or boisterous or why are you sharing all this stuff?
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Who cares that you're at the gym type of this culture in?
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But for me it's about public accountability.
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If, no, if no one knows, I walk into a gym and get on the treadmill like two minutes later, like I'm out, I'm done.
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And for me, what's always motivated me from a young age is public accountability.
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And not because it's bragging or not because I want hey, look at me, you know, in some of the culture we're in now that's what it's like.
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But for me I love the shared experiences.
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I love when somebody random is like, hey, I write a 5k and they're like I'm and they were just excited to share with me, not because they cared about their score or time it.
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It's about the public accountability and I use that time.
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So it really started when I was in Boston college and and for me, if you have a schedule, you can have your day regimented, and I know that I'm a morning person.
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I love it.
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I got up at five when I lived with my grandma for a little bit and we'd eat cookies before my mom got up, like that was our special time and I've always been that way.
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So when I was at Boston College, I knew if I tried to do work after I did principal work all day I'm out, can't do it.
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So I was a morning worker.
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And then when I graduated in 2016, I'm like what do?
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I do with this time now, and that's really when I started to get into writing and doing some of the professional work.
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And then, after eating a pound of Twizzlers, like every day on the ride to work, I'm like, all right, now I got to also do something else and I'm one that likes to overcome challenges, so combining the public accountability with overcoming challenges.
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Like you know, I'm one that likes to overcome challenges, so combining the public accountability with overcoming challenges.
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Like you know, I'm six foot, anywhere between 230 and 250, depending on the season, and I know I'm not a runner.
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So I'm like, okay, that's a challenge for me, like that's, that's a challenge that I want to try to overcome.
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And it's not about the times, it's not about place, although once I crossed 50, boy, I place a lot better in the 50 and older group.
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So I just started to do that.
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And then this season, actually November, I did a Spartan race at Fenway and it was super cool and I just talked about it the other day to professional, because there were 5,300 people who entered and I came in 5,000th place.
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Entered and I came in 5,000th place and the thing I share is like oh, but I finished 94% of the challenges and to me that's more important because the fourth place person and the 5,000th place person we got the same medal.
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It was about finishing, it was about overcoming challenges and it was about the training aspect for me.
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I wasn't going in there racing the people that are on the cover of like Fitness Magazine.
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I wanted to make sure that if it took me three times as long, I was going to finish the challenge, because that was my goal and that's part of the morning.
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Wellness part is I'm competing against myself, like I'm not competing against other people, and that's both professionally and that's both in the wellness space is like what's good for me at 52 years old and how do I eat healthier and work out and that's my morning routine is that if I start every day that way, no matter what happens next, it's going to be a good day for me and it really boils down to my wellness foundation at Springfield College.
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Shout out to Springfield.
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Their humanics philosophy is a healthy spirit, mind and body, and I've tried to model that since 18 years old.
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Sounds good, among more, among more.
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So folks are following you, cause I mean, you have the smile factor podcast as well, and one of the things that I I was just it's been sitting on my screen for a while is your mind, uh, mindfulness monday.
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And it's not monday when we're doing this, but one of the things that, uh, like I said, you inspired me a great deal is, for me, I'm stopping, I'm trying to pause, I'm trying to breathe, and you have have a message that says Mindfulness Monday breathe deeply, live mindfully, notice the small miracles woven into each moment, right, and so you continue to find ways to just at least put something out there into the ether that is positive and that may galvanize the right energy in a world that has some storms at times.
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Yeah, and I think that's where the most recent iteration of the Mindfulness Monday or Wellness Wednesday, because I was going through some storms and there was two directions to go I can complain about the storm or I can get an umbrella and for me it's like I'm going to have my little pity party for a minute and you know we all do it and I'm going to vent to some close friends.
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And then what helps me get through a storm as we're using that as a metaphor is being active in some capacity.
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What can I can control, and I'm someone that's on the go a lot, and Craig pointed out a lot of things that I do.
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Where I found that I was not being healthy and well was that I just kept going faster when there was a storm and there was a challenge or there was an issue at work or in my life.
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Instead of going faster, I wanted to be more efficient and slowing down.
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I actually was more productive.
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Weather the storm, there's always going to be another storm, but if I'm in the right frame of mind because not only do I do all the things that you were saying, I'm the assistant superintendent of New Bedford Public Schools and we are 14,000 students in 25 schools, so I think not having that morning routine helps me be ready for work, but also fills my bucket in the professional space outside of here, outside of work, and if one person and this goes back to the social media of the difference between confident and cocky.
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I don't put things out because I want people to look at me.
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If one person reads it and they have a better day, it's worth the 40 seconds it took to do it, but it's another.
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Personally, it's another public accountability that I have.
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I want to put something out on Monday because it also helps me reflect, and I want to put something out on Wednesday.
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I put something out five days a week for the Stronger Together message, because those are the three core things for me right now Collaboration, you know, wellness and being healthy.
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I'm taking in everything that you're saying and I have a couple pieces to ask you about, but one is what kind of cookies did you eat with her grandmother?
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Cause you caught me on that one, oh so she well, I still have this debate with family members, because there's nobody will ever make a carrot cake like her.
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That's still my favorite dessert because she would put white raisins in it and some special sugar.
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I don't even know what it was, but it was awesome.
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So she was Italian and the Ciali Mazzango shout out to grandma.
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And she had two that we always would eat before anybody woke up.
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One were the true, true Italian cookies, like dough, like in a pretzel looking thing, and then the frosting with sprinkles.
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But the ones that I could probably eat 40 of were molasses cookies.
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She would like molasses cookies about the size of a silver dollar, and then on the top was just whatever melted sugar frosting.
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So it had a little crunch, but the cookie was warm, so as soon as it came out of the oven we would eat a few.
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Granted, she was diabetic, so it was the only time she could eat them too, because I would never rat on her.
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So we would like have cookies at five in the morning.
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And I remember one of the things that I talked about at her eulogy because I was one of the I was the speaker essentially was that when I heard the big curtains they lived in the Cape Cod, so when my parents split I spent a lot of time with them that they had these huge like six foot, eight foot windows and the curtains.
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You just moved them by hand.
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I heard that curtain, I jumped and ran out of bed Like grandma's up.
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So those were, those were our cookies.
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You know what?
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That would have gotten me out of bed at five o'clock too.
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If I would have known I would have.
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I was getting warm.
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Yeah, absolutely.
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And it reminds me of times when I slept over at my grandmother's house and we would get up and sometimes it would be like homemade fast knots or like they were rising, that it was just.
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I'm like oh, I need to know about these cookies.
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Yeah, those are my, those are my jam, and everybody, everybody knows.
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Oh, here's my other secret and I know we're not talking about this, but you said we're just riffing on it.
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My family still debates because they're like she left us the recipe and nobody can make anything that she made as good as her.
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And everybody's debating and I said to all my family I said you know she didn't write the recipes how she makes it right?
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You know she's not leaving you the exact recipe so that every time you make something we can talk about her.
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Every time you make these holiday things, these cookies, these whatever specialty things, and we're like oh, we miss grandma, it doesn't taste like her.
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I said she did not leave you the special Ciali recipe, it's just how she works Smart woman there.
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Yeah, that's how you live forever.
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Oh, and again, I was the prince, so I loved it, and everyone in my family.
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She had two Prince, so I loved it, and everyone in my family.
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She had two, three daughters, and then I was the first boy of that children, grandchildren, so I was there, and then my sister and cousin.
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They don't, they just don't compete.
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Sorry, they know that too Like.
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My boys argue about who's their favorite and we we call out to my parents too, because I'm the oldest of four, like who's the favorite, and we know in to my parents too, because I'm the oldest of four, like who's the favorite, and we know, and my siblings we know, who the favorite is.
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It's not me, but that's okay, that's okay.
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Yeah, well, and even to get into the family's piece of this.
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So her husband, my grandfather, george Xavier Joseph he was the original Xavier and he never finished high school and he was a foreman.
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Like he was a worker and that was my thing is like I have to carry on this legacy and carry that name on to ensure that I do better than than not, because I ever competed.
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But he's like I'm going to work as a worker so that my family could have better, and I always remember that.
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I love that Well and, as I'm hearing you, with the pieces of action that you put into place, that doesn't just happen without a really deep sense of self and social awareness, and I really love those pieces as well, because you mentioned that you know you're more productive in the morning, and I would say that as I've gotten older, I have found that I get my best work done in the morning as well, and while I don't get up at five, I do aspire to that because I've heard there's a whole book about a 5 am club but I know that if I get up between six and six thirty, I have my three cups of coffee while I'm working.
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I can really, I feel like I get almost a whole day in before 11 o'clock happens.
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And so I appreciate that awareness, and you're constantly looking for a challenge to to better yourself, whether it's through exercise or through learning or by collaborating and giving back to the community.
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And I'm looking at the books here that you offer and that you have worked to create and to publish, and so we've got Always Stop at a Lemonade Stand.
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First of all, I love that title because I will always stop at a lemonade stand, because I remember having the lemonade stands out in my neighborhoods and even if it was only for 5 cents, like you put the time and the energy and you just want to be validated and seen and be excited.
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And then you have a book on the power of connections and disrupting the status quo.
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So we talked about like favorite children.
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I'm going to ask you like which book do you feel, maybe, that you had the most learning through as you were writing and putting it out there?
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So I think, just like we do as professionals and I continue to try to do Craig knows I ask questions a lot about culturally responsive work and, being a white male in 52 in Massachusetts, I need a lot of work in that area.
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There is a gap for me.
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So I always am reaching out, I'm always trying to be better.
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And I think to your answer it's the last, the most recent book Always Stop at Lemonade Stand only because it's my most vulnerable book in the sense that I share the most about my life and upbringing, because I think, as I've aged, I think strength is in vulnerability and I've thought, you know, in my 40s we'll say I had to be the boss, I was the principal, I was the this.
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I had to be the stoic kind of person and it didn't fit well for me being raised by a single mom and with my grandmother and helping my sister walk to work.
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That wasn't me.
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So as I wrote this book and then the reason is because one of the father figures I had, he would drive me around and when we would have weekends and he would say, always stop at Lemonade, sandy, give him $5.
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And I'd be like it was only like 30 cents and he's like, yeah, you know what it took for that kid to do that.
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So the heart of the book is also the heart of my work.
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It talks about people in my life that have got me to see things as they are.
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But then it goes into student entrepreneurship.
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So the heart of the book for education is that empower students to be entrepreneurs in school, like turn over the control.
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We don't have to be in the control and let them do it.
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And so if I had to say a favorite not because it's the most recent, I think a close runner up, because Craig is on the cover is Stronger Together, because that is the heart of the work of who I am, from Springfield College, from collaboration, from just empowering myself by raising others.
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Yeah, I love this.
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You know, plug this boomerang that you just did, but it's okay, hey, I got you.
00:19:48.814 --> 00:20:12.896
So, uh, you know, as I think about, uh, beyonce, I think about lemonade and I, you know, the lemons that you have on your cover, um, but I know that that lemonade provided a sense of power, and I believe you have such a powerful existence and presence in the world.
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What do you?
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feel at this time is your superpower?
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I think it's to allow others to see me making some mistakes or trying things that don't work, because we get caught up in.
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You always have to be right or you always want to get it right the first try, and I think, empowering others that your story matters.
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And I'm a big flood, the market person because I've got to a point in for a while now in my life that it's not going to always be right or work.
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That's how I got my first article published.
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I wrote 10 articles.
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I sent them all in.
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They all got rejected.
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Then I'm like all right, what's the feedback?
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And they told me I sent 10 more and one got published.
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So one out of 19.
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And some people are like I'm going to spend two years on one article.
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That's just not me.
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I'm going to keep trying because I own the fact that if I've been told no, I'm going to try harder.
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So I think I wouldn't say necessarily it's a superpower.
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However, what I think people have liked that I've surrounded myself whether they gravitate to the work that I do is that I'm going to keep going.
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I'm not going to be kept down and if you have a story to share if you have an idea we're going to make it happen how it looks.
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I have no idea.
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Share if you have an idea we're gonna make it happen how it looks.
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I have no idea.
00:21:30.186 --> 00:21:36.528
And you know, even like we said with juritsa, we were talking about her first book, about mckenzie's time machine, about her baby.
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I met her again yesterday.
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It was amazing and she's like can I write a story about my baby?
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And she's gonna go through history and talk about, you know, black and brown historical figures.
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Nobody's doing that.
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I was like, all right, let's do that.
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And I think, if I had to choose something from that specific question, is that I instill confidence in other people to try something they might not have tried.
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I think it's powerful to know that a no is a not yet, and so your illustration of hey, one out of 19 tries got you a published article and you have continued to turn those no's into not yet.
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That has become yes and absolutely.
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And now you're doing that for other folks as well is not only helping them to actualize their own dreams that they may not have thought was possible, but you're also generating enough confidence and support and advocacy for them that they actually actualized their own dream that they felt was like a glass ceiling in their own space.
00:22:40.241 --> 00:22:46.334
So I think that that's a really great limit or set of lemonade recipe.
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There you go, proud of the endorsement, but it is.
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It's a very powerful, is a very powerful anecdote to the fear that so many of us face in regards to are we good enough, are we worthy enough in these spaces and in these spheres?
00:23:03.768 --> 00:23:20.563
Yeah, and I think to that point too, where we get stuck is there's such an imbalance of power in our work and in our professional work that let's say, say there's five publishers or there's five podcast possible hosts and I send something in and they don't like it.
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That doesn't mean my work's not good, it just doesn't match what they want to do.
00:23:24.642 --> 00:23:35.673
And too often people get stuck in like I'm not good enough because you know, insert person, insert a group didn't like something that I submitted.
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You know I share this all the time.
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I was at an event in November, I was the keynote speaker.
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There was like 2000 people there and then another event a month later.
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They didn't accept the proposal for me to speak.
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So it's two very different examples where I'm not getting let down by the one that did.
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I mean I was literally on the stage three weeks ago but you didn't feel like my content was worthy for your group.
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That's fine, that's cool for you.
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I'm not going to let me slow down because I own what works for me.
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I'm not saying everything I do is great.
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Let's not confuse that.
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I'm just confident that there is an audience for some of the work that I want to share and it fits in some places and it doesn't fit in others.
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That's really resonating with me, because I think often that I relate that to being authentic and knowing what you bring to the table.
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And I think about the work that I do in SEL for school districts and a couple of times someone's like, well, do you do it this way or will you do that?
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And I'm like you know what?
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No, that's just not my, that's not our process, that's not what I think feels good working forward to make an impact, and and that's okay.
00:24:50.183 --> 00:25:26.993
And so I love that you're talking about there being a fit, because you know, I apply for conferences too and sometimes it's accepted and sometimes it's not, and that's okay because whoever they're getting is the right fit for what they need and whoever feels that they're working with me or you or Craig, like we're the right fit for them, and I like that abundance mentality, because I think often that doesn't happen so much in either consulting or in education in general, and so I think those are just good pieces for us to continue to ponder and think on and is in line with your idea of elevating other people's work.
00:25:27.660 --> 00:25:44.885
Yeah, and it goes to the heart of your work in the SEL that if I like myself and like what I'm creating and I share it and one person is like this was impactful I used it in my classroom I'm good, like that's it.
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And if no one does, let's say nobody, it's like okay, I'm going to tweak it to make it better.
00:25:51.090 --> 00:26:00.824
And I think we're so worried about followers or likes or clicks and it's like you know, sometimes some of the things I post up a hundred people that that saw.
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Oh well, so that's a hundred more than wouldn't have if I didn't post it.
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I'm not, it doesn't matter to me, it's about I get better by everything I do.
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How it supports other people, that's a bonus.
00:26:15.941 --> 00:26:27.465
Well and so thinking about and I know we want to be aware of your time because it is definitely a gift that I know you're pulled in a lot of different directions and thinking about what you've shared with us.
00:26:27.465 --> 00:26:37.226
If people want to collaborate with you and want to listen more to the Stronger Together podcast, we're going to link to that and to your books, but how can they get a hold of you?
00:26:37.226 --> 00:26:39.346
What's the best way for people to reach out to you?
00:26:39.828 --> 00:26:59.326
Sure, and so the two best ways are my website is xfactorlink and I think that'll take you to a whole barrage of professional development insights, podcasts, books or on X platform, matthew X Joseph at Matthew X Joseph, and all will be there.
00:26:59.326 --> 00:27:11.053
And again, I think, for individuals who listen to your work and the whole social emotional piece and are worried that who's going to listen to me if I share something, it doesn't matter, somebody will.
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It's important to you.
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Everybody has a story.
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Craig and I were both elementary school principals.
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We look different.
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